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10 Types of Pedestrians We Love to Hate (continued)

2 - The Assumer This is the type of pedestrian that assumes that just because the cars have come to a stop it’s clear to cross the street, not considering that there might be a bike flying between the cars. Bam! Those are always major takeouts as they get hammered, ricocheting off of multiple cars, before they finally meet the pavement in an ugly way. Can you say pinball?

3 - The Cellphone Moron These modern high-tech idiots step into the street with their cell glued to their ear, staring downward, unable to multi-task. They’re completely ignoring everything around them, only intent on chatting on their celly and oblivious that they just stepped into your path. The only pleasurable thing for a rider in this situation is watching not just them being splattered like so much roadkill, but their phone invariably exploding into multiple fragments upon impact. Tech death!

4 - The Back Stepper These are the pedestrians who react badly upon noticing at the last minute that they just stepped into your path. The problem is that you’ve noticed and planned avoidance by changing your path to veer behind them, but so much for the plans of mice and men as they get spooked seeing you, and with delayed reaction, back step right into your path that you intended to avoid them with. The Two-Step Slam Dance.

5 - Ghetto Trash “Tough” Guys These are the complete morons of every color and creed that in their ignorant pitiful lives, in their childish way of making themselves seem tough, purposely walk right into your path, or in the least as close as possible, that somehow makes them feel “tough” that they won’t allow anyone to invade “their space.” Of course, if they actually had any brains and paid attention in high school science class, they’d know the physics that if they got hit by a moving object of their same size, they would lose, in a big way. But then, we’re not talking smart here, we’re talking about the dumbest of the dumb. Time to take out the garbage!